Have you ever walked away from a conversation at a networking event thinking “Well, that went nowhere!”. It’s happened to me many times with people I’ve met in networking events and I’m pretty sure people have said that about me too in my early days of networking as a professional.
But whether you love or loathe them, networking events are a staple of professional life. They can unlock career-changing opportunities, spark collaborations, or simply offer fresh perspectives (if you approach them strategically).
Yet all too often, we mistake networking for speed dating, therapy sessions, or worse, one-sided monologues. If you've ever experienced that, chances are, you’ve met someone who broke one of the three golden rules of networking success.
Let’s break them down.
1. Be Smart
The art of networking begins with listening. According to research on interpersonal communication, people rate conversations more positively when they feel heard. Yet, under the pressure to impress, many default to talking at someone rather than engaging with them.
Avoid this pitfall by shifting your focus. Instead of stressing over reciting your résumé as best you can, get curious. Ask insightful questions that invite people to share their stories. This not only builds rapport, but also leaves a more memorable impression, because let’s face it, people remember how you made them feel more than what you said.
Smart tip: Use the 80/20 rule, that is aim to listen 80% of the time and speak for just 20%. You'll seem wiser and more charismatic than any sales pitch could achieve.
2. Be Brief
First impressions are made quickly and often within seconds. That means clarity and relevance are key. Share who you are and why you're there, but resist the urge to dive into your life story or mention any recent misfortunes.
Keep things connected to the context of the event. Staying on topic not only respects your conversation partner's time but also keeps you focused and purposeful.
Brief tip: Prepare a 30-second introduction that’s concise and context specific. Think of it as your "entry pitch". It should include your name and role/profession, why you are at the conference/event (i.e. “I am here to connect with like-minded people and learn more about…”), a smooth transition to invite others to speak (i.e. “What about you?” or “I would love to know more about you”) which shows that you do not intend to monopolise the conversation.
3. Be Gone
This might sound harsh, but knowing when to leave a conversation is just as important as knowing how to start one. Networking is fluid by nature; lingering too long with one person can block both of you from making other meaningful connections.
Master the graceful exit. Thank them, express interest in following up (if appropriate), and move on. It shows confidence, respect, and situational awareness, three qualities that are remembered long after the event ends.
Gone tip: Have a few closing lines ready, such as: “It’s been great talking to you. I'll let you mingle, but I hope we cross paths again.”
After all, networking isn't about collecting business cards or flexing accomplishments. It’s about meaningful moments of connection. Master the trinity “Be Smart. Be Brief. Be Gone.” and you’ll turn small talk into smart opportunities.
.jpg)
